Baggage Examination

Nerdboy got a gold star yesterday for coming to Mom's house, cooking us dinner (I was supposed to but he arrived early and took over), enduring dinner with Mom, packing up all my books, taking apart my vintage bike, and helping me move everything into the new place.
Not sure why I deserve all that!

My roommate was out so we lay on my bed.  I am really really uptight about doing the sexy things when other people are in the house, or could even guess that sex had taken place before they got home.  So even though we were alone, I didn't feel like doing that stuff.  And, it was time for talking anyways.  Friend in the North kept bugging me to really talk to him about STDs (STIs, I think they're called now, in Canada anyways) and to find out what 'I have to talk to you about something at some point' was all about.

We just lay there face to face.  I asked him questions about his birthday, middle name, etc.  At one point he said he was distantly in line to a dukedom and I'd have to marry him and bear an heir.  (Again, marriage jokes!)  I kept frowning a little and he asked why and I spat out, 'I have to ask you about STDs'.  He was tested a few months ago and everything was fine.  He said yes, he'd had casual sex this year and was very careful but he went to the clinic to be sure.   (Uh, great that you're careful, but so very different from how I live!)
Then he told me his thing.  Ten years or so ago he'd been in an abusive relationship with a man.  He had to go to the hospital, he wasn't clear but I think he had his jaw broken.  Since then he hasn't had a boyfriend, or many male friends.  He gets a bit uncomfortable being touched by strangers, especially if they approach from behind.  He said he was okay with me touching him from the start, which was a notable exception.  I remember hugging him the first meeting and him looking shocked, and then hugging back.

He said there might be bad days when even I won't be allowed to touch him.

So, I don't know how to relate to this or what it means for our relationship in the future.  He's got such high hopes for me.

DO.  NOT.  WANT.  TO.  BE.  RESPONSIBLE.  FOR.  SOMEONE.  ELSE'S.  HAPPINESS.

Also, how does casual sex fit into the 'no touching strangers' rule?  I really don't get it.

Oh, and he'd been a sperm donor to his lesbian friends and now they have a daughter.  They live on the other side of the world now.  He doesn't consider her to be his child, but he would be the guardian if something happened to her parents.  So his genes will carry on, even if he gets the vasectomy.

I swear, I can't make this stuff up.  He assured me that was all the baggage on the table, and he doesn't have any more surprises for me.

I told him I guessed the thing he had to talk to me about involved joining a swinger's club because I was running out of subjects he'd hesitate to talk to me about.  He thought that was funny and we actually had a nice conversation about monogamy and cheating.

He keeps telling me we're not as different as I think we are.

He is being amazingly sweet to me.  Mildly awkward/embarrassing when meeting my family and friends, should I be concerned?  (He has a tendency to make jokes about punishing stupid people/ misbehaving children quite harshly, and I don't find them funny.)

Anyways, we'll keep walking down this road and see where it goes.