Last night got a phone mesage at 9:45pm. "Uh you're booked for an interview tomorrow at 9:15am and I'm just looking through the emails and I'm not sure we told you...well we must have told you. See you tomorrow."
So this morning I was there bright and early and bleary-eyed. I was interviewed by three women. It was a little awkward. I hate formal interviews. If only they would start off by describing the position! I didn't do a great interview, I didn't 'sparkle' but I got through it. Don't expect to get the job, but I'd already assumed I wasn't even going to be interviewed (this is the rescheduled interview previously mentioned) and had let it go. Would be a great starter job for me, very part time- I would have done it for free.
I really need to learn how to interview. Can't sell myself.
Other things:
One friend's father is dying. Another friend just had surgery so she will never be a mother. I don't know how to comfort them.
I compared my sadness to theirs, and mine didn't seem that unbearable. Or maybe just different. I don't know. Perspective. Life.
Today, one of the kids I work with told me her mom just had a baby. Then she said, 'You have a big belly. Do you have a baby?'
I went to a one-day course on Permaculture. I thought I'd learn about plants, which we did, but we also learned about finding the patterns in anything that you do, in considering your needs, in observing a full cycle of the pattern, and then designing a solution carefully (usually it's how you lay out your home and garden but could be anything) The guy said, the problem is the solution to something else. In nature, sure, every pest has a predator but in human life things are a bit more complicated. It's sort of comforting to think maybe I'm the solution to someone else's problem, that they are lonely like I am.
Oh, it's hard to put everything that happened that day into words. We were outside all day looking at plants in the rain, and there were a bunch of hippie-type people, and some not-so-hippie type people, and I drove a car full of strangers and we got along and I didn't get lost. It was a few hours out of town, and I loved the small-town feel, the beautiful forest. I didn't want to leave.
Yeah, I still want to learn how to grow my own food and build cob houses and all sorts of weird stuff but I'm not into alternate medicine or the power of crystals or images like this:
Well anyways, another step down the path towards .....whatever you want to call it. My new lifestyle. It's sorta pretend at the moment, but we'll see. At least I'm getting exposed to new ideas.
Maybe I'll start seeing solutions where I've only seen problems before...
No comments:
Post a Comment