Oh, what a month.
So, I ended it with Nerdboy in May. I bet he wouldn't go a week without contacting me. He did make it 8 days, then he just had to give me some random stuff he was getting rid of. And when I saw him, I realized I was mad at him. It was a short and awkward meeting.
But, I had given him a piece of my art that I needed to borrow for a show. So, I asked if I could pick it up the next day (Sunday).
Sunday I texted to let him know I had driven my new car (small victory, I hate driving stick) and was in his neighbourhood all day. He didn't answer. I was a bit concerned, but was distracted doing other things. Just as I was getting ready to leave, he texted back. He said he'd turned his phone to silent all day and 'disconnected from reality'. He said he needed a walk and would come to my studio. (uh, did you not get the part about me driving?)
I waited. What was going to happen? He arrived with the art piece, and he smelled of booze. He let me hug him. I expressed concern about his mental health, the drinking. He said it was the first time he'd fallen off the wagon, seemed to shrug it off.
I said I'd drive him home. (Because I'm still shaky with driving manual, I was a bit nervous about the busy street by the studio, so was glad to have him for that part.)
and I drove reasonably confidently and he was pleasantly surprised, and there we were, parked in front of his house (my old home)
And he said, Do you want to go get gelato?
so i went, even though I hadn't had dinner. (we left the car parked at his place and walked) And he said he felt very guilty that he'd hurt me twice.
I said I could have stood it all except seeing the dating profile.
And he didn't answer, and conveniently some cars honked at each other and the topic changed.
Somehow we agreed that even though we should be taking a break, we both wanted to be friends. And that he could come help at the aforementioned show on the following weekend.
Talk about emotional labour- comforting the guy who broke your heart because he feels bad about breaking your heart. I felt stronger than him, actually.
At the show, following weekend- he helped set up on Friday, and was a but moody but helpful. I was going to sneak in some of his art to my booth but at the last minute he freaked out and wouldn't bring it. Saturday he showed up and was definitely in a weird mood but warmed up during the day, and went home and brought his art, and it did well, and everything seemed fine. We talked about going to dinner together but decided we were tired.
Sunday he was cheerful and in a quiet moment he decided to tell me a funny story about being hit on by older men on the internet. WAAAAAAAAH! I do not want to hear about his internet dating. I told him so and punched him in the arm. After that I wanted him to leave but he did not. Dammit,, I needed his van to unload or I would have sent him away.
He packed up everything efficiently, and it reminded me of many shows he's helped me with.
Back at my studio, everything put away, I hugged him goodbye, too long, and told he he had to leave, and burst out crying.
Monday he texted to ask if we were going to see a movie. (I guess I'd invited him weeks before on facebook, it was a special screening. I'd forgotten about it) I said I needed more time.
He said, I understand, I'll be here when you're ready.
And I've seen him once since then (another urgent dropoff of stuff) and he texted today that he saw me walking on the street.
No comments:
Post a Comment