Typing Out Loud

If you read this blog for just the dating stuff, I'm still as celibate as ever.  This post is about the rest of my life, 'cause I need to think.

I'm actually in a fairly good mood, and wanting to Take Action and Start Lots of Projects!  Who knows when I'll crash again so I might as well use this energy and get something done.  Getting stuff done has the nice effect of keeping the mood up, because I feel capable and efficient!

My sister advised me to just get a job, any job.  It's almost Christmas and there will be seasonal work in retail.  Ugh! I hate consumerism, commercialism and plastic bags, but perhaps I can find something I can stand for 3 months.  I've also put in a few applications for jobs in my field, so just gotta keep looking while I wait to hear back.

Meanwhile, I need to find out what skills/experience I'm missing and try and get that through volunteering or training.  There's some online courses I want to take, and I really need to start researching what's it's going to take to get a Master's degree in something like Art Education or Culture and Heritage.

Mean-meanwhile, there's so much to do I don't have time for a job!  I have previously shared my Joe's Goals page, where I keep track of what I've done every day and score myself.  On an ideal day, I'd walk my dog, and do yoga, eat healthy mostly-vegetarian meals prepared at home, clean the house, make art, drink water, floss, read, and leave the house at least once and walking the dog doesn't really count.  That all takes at least 6 hours!  The problem is that making art is supposed to be my job, that I should be putting in several hours of drawing and creating a day if I want to be any good.

I'm not drawing at all.  I haven't drawn in months.  I keep putting it off.  I should be doing it right now!  Once I start doing it I'll be fine.  There's this fear every time you look at a blank piece of paper. I know I always have to face it and just start doing stuff, making marks, being ok with failing, and next thing you know, you're drawing.  Sorry for changing tenses mid-sentence.  It's Friday and the grammar police are off-duty.

I have several projects on the horizon, so I think I've cleared enough practical stuff out of the way to just sit down and create.  I feel like I've been making process in other areas; I've been out there meeting new people and taking in the arts scene, and now I need to be alone and quiet to process everything I've learned and seen for a while.  Hence all the books.  But I can't just take ideas in- I need to start getting stuff out of me too.  Just draw!   Feel free to nag me next week in the comments!

In the 'Quiet' book reviewed in the last post, the author mentioned that the book was mostly written in cafes. She tried to work at home but it was too quiet or too easy to get distracted.  In a cafe, there's a low level of background noise and stimulation that seemed to be about right for her, plus she could see other people working on their laptops.  So I might try that.  Drawing outings.  Can't bring all my paints and inks unfortunately, but could still get some ideas down on paper.  Plus you never know what you'll see or hear or who you meet just being out in the world.  Still enjoying reading 'Quiet', by the way.

Sometimes I do a 'No Computer for a Week' challenge and I try not to watch TV or use the computer for said week.  (I usually have to check email a few times though)  I even like to play vinyl records instead of my iPod to really get in the spirit!

I'm in one of those moods where I want to make 5 year plans for my life and set goals!  I do this periodically, and am really bad at following through...

Hmm.  I was going to write this whole big thing about activism and me figuring out if I want to be a radical or not!  I found this leadership program that trains people in how to make a difference.  It's a six month program and I've just missed the start date so I'll have to wait until next year.  I think I want to do it, but more about that later.  Like I said, it's Friday night.  So lazy.

Other tidbits.

Our old cat died this week.  He was actually my brother-in-law's cat, but we adopted the cat when Bro-in-law and my sis moved into their condo.  So Cat wasn't with us that long, but he was a nice old cat.  Death is very weird.  One day fine, the next day gone.  I didn't cry, just had some reflection time.

Walrus' mom got hit by a car.  She's fine!  No broken bones, no concussion, but she's very sore and taking the week off work.  I have been meaning to visit her, but can't bring myself to do it. (Been using a mild cold as an excuse.)  They truly are the unluckiest family.

I see Walrus at choir and maybe once a week outside of that, due to some extra choir events or us actually making plans together.  I think it's ok.  Wondering if we need to 'talk' about us being just friends... He called me 'dear' once more.  I'm just ignoring it.