Picky or Panicked?

I spent a lovely but wet weekend at a music festival that I love and look forward to every year.  I volunteer for the art crew that puts on a display.  I  often spend a good part of the weekend in crazy costumes as part of this.  Last year a photographer at the festival really loved our display and took lots of photos and talked to us for a long time.  I happened to be wearing a Princess Leia costume at the time.  Weeks later I was searching through photos on flickr and came across a nice image of one of my art pieces.  I wrote to the photographer for permission to use it and it turned out to be the same guy.  Somewhere in this email exchange I must have shared a link to where I was using the photo because he looked at my online portfolio and praised it.
Sometime later he emailed me and said he just had nice prints made of the festival photos and would I like one?  I offered to trade one of my postcards for it.  I thought we would just mail them or do a drop-off thing but he wanted to meet at a bookstore (that I happen to love.) 
So I agreed to that, and off I went.  I didn't recognize him at first, and there was that awkward moment similar to the online dating first moment of 'Are you waiting for me?'  We browsed the shelves for a while and talked.  I got a bit shy I suppose.  He walked with me to the bus stop.  He talked about this movie he was just about to go see, and asked if I had seen it...I'm not sure but I think it was almost an invite to go with him.
I just went home.  At the bus stop he said something about him being old and depending on young people like me to keep him up on what's hip.  Okay, I don't think he used those words.  Is the word 'hip' hip again or not?  Anyways....
We added each other as flickr contacts so I do keep up with his photos.  I saw him briefly at another art event but I was again in silly costume and he didn't recognize me.
A year later, I saw his name on a friend's facebook page and added him as a friend.  I'm not sure what my motivation was.  On the surface I just thought it was useful to know a talented photographer.
This weekend I saw him at the festival and he came and talked to me for a while.  He said he was going to send me his number on facebook and I said ok.  The rest of the festival I spent with my stomach in knots.  I was always on the lookout for him, but the one time I did see him I didn't wave and he didn't see me in the crowd.  I didn't even spot him the next day at all.
What does it mean- "I'll send you my phone number on facebook so we can chat"?  He didn't do it yet, so perhaps I'm anxious over nothing...

I'm not even sure what I want to happen.  I imagine he's 8 to 10 years older than me.  I don't find him particularily attractive, but he's not ugly or repulsive in any way.  He seems to be smart and as far as I can tell a nice person, if a little geeky.

It's not even so much about who he is as it is about me freaking out about considering the possibility of what I so rarely consider as a possibility.  (Although it is interesting to see what 'league' I'm in...to use a vulgar expression.)  I am absolutely panicked at the thought of doing the dating thing and having to decide how far I want it to go and how to tell him I'm not interested.  Yes, I'm hypothetically breaking things off before I've even been asked out.  But that's just part of dating and everybody does it and somehow people deal with the rejection and the rejecting and the world goes on. 

Even more terrifying to me is the thought of someone kissing me, and then they would know that I don't know how to kiss because I've never done it before and then I'd have to tell them that was my first kiss and that I never dated and then I would be undesirable in their eyes because nobody else wanted me so they wouldn't either.  
That moment is coming for me.  At some point I will have to tell somebody I never kissed anybody.  I dread that moment, and I dread not having that moment.

That pretty much sums it up.  That's what I think about everyday and what makes me flighty on the rare occasions I do get some male interest.  Bit of a catch-22.  Maybe some 40-year old guy will relish having an untouched, malleable, and grateful younger girlfriend.  Creepy!

The other part of the inner turmoil is 'Am I being too picky if I decide not to go out with this fellow?'  Do I have to take what I can get at this point?  Am I willing to use someone just so I can say I've kissed someone and feel somewhat normal?  Or is it the opposite, that I'm shutting down a possible relationship because I'm scared?  Should I give this person a chance if I have no really reason to reject them other than the age difference?  It really feels awful to think you have no choice but to take any offer and be grateful.

I really can't imagine having a boyfriend.  I can't imagine the type of man that would be interested in me and I him.  A person who picks me over every other girl out there.  I can't even imagine someone's head being close enough to mine to kiss, let alone all the stuff that comes after that.  I can't imagine trusting someone that much.

So confused and tired right now.